111

Wed, June 18, 86, 7am

+People make me sad.  Godless people, blind people, deaf to My calls.

 - Me too?

+Not so much, but sometimes you hurt My heart.

 - What most with?

+Coldness, forgetting Me.  Sometimes pride.

 You lack childlike trust, although you have so much evidence of My love and care.

 I'm sorry to have to train you.  Then I suffer with you.

 - What should I say to you, Father?  I will not make promises, because I know how few of them I have kept so far.

 Added to all this is the indecision...

 +You are right, but promises are still motivating, although they are not fully kept.  So what do you promise me?

 - Obedience...

+That's all?

 - Complete devotion: my thoughts and feelings.  Love - I guess I can put it that way.  Trust.

+You can - try to keep it.

110

Tue,  June 17, 86, 2pm

- Am I not having a conversation with myself?

+No, child. Trust.

Psalm 138:7.3.1-2 

109

Mon, June 16, 86, 11:30pm

- My thoughts were running wild and I didn't even try to grab them and bring them to You.

 There's something wrong with me.

+My child, I know human tribulations and I know the pain associated with them.

 I subject you to these afflictions - for your own good.

 Your life will be full of loneliness, longing and pain.  And happy meetings with Me.

 You are suspended between the world and Me.  The world hurts you and I watch over you more often now in secret.

 You are not alone, although it may seem so.  Trust My love.  I will always love you because it is My Nature.

 - I know this, and therefore I find it difficult to bear my ingratitude to You, and I cannot change it.

+Your distractions have their human justification.

 You are human and you are subject to human tendencies.  I know this.  Do you think that others who follow Me, do not have similar afflictions?

 They must have them because that is the way of growth.

 Accept your own sinfulness with hope and trust in My Love and My Mercy.

 - It seems that I should give a funeral to my many illusions and leave only my helplessness and lay it at Your feet.

 +It's time for you to do it.  Do you know how much depends on it?  Do you know that this is the threshold beyond which I await you with My great bounty? That I am waiting for this step of yours?

 Do it - I will give you a helping hand, because the threshold is high, and you really are completely powerless.

 Do you trust what I say?

 - Yes, Father.  I trust.

+Then trust and think of nothing else, and worry about nothing.

 Just repeat this one word in your heart.