303

Fri, 28 XI 86, 11pm

- Why does the heart hurt?

+From longing, desire and a sense of impossibility.  The greatness of My Love and the smallness of the human heart are painful.

 It's the pain of transformation.  Healing, bringing peace to the soul.

302

Thu,  27 XI 86, 8am

+Learn to endure, wanting nothing, expecting nothing.  Get rid of thinking about yourself.  Give me everything and that too.  Become completely devoid of everything - in the nakedness of your soul, except your feelings and thoughts.

You have nothing.  You have only Me who is your life and your hope.

 May joy and peace reign in your soul, because God is with you and in you.

 God of peace and silence.

 Do you know how much can be said with silence?  It is richer than any words.

 

 301

 Wed, XI 26, 86, 9:30am 

- What is my prayer worth when I can't get anything out of myself?

 +My child, after all, I know you and I know what is in your heart.  You don't have to being out.

 I will bring it out Myself when I want.  It is important that you are with Me, even though you are struggling in your impotence and longing.

 - You showed me this morning the truth that by Your will man is a co-creator of himself.  Free will allows us to create ourselves together with you.  No creature of Yours has such a privilege.

 Neither do angels, because they are created fully and therefore they are perfect.

 You allow us to complete Your work in us.

 What an immensely valuable and dangerous privilege.  Why?

+I wanted and I want you to be My children, not slaves.  You know what the word "child" means.

 Do not write down the truths that I reveal to you, for they are much greater than the narrowness of words and concepts of man.

 You have these truths in your soul.  When you need to give them to someone, I will arrange and make it possible.

Learn to be restrained in revealing the secrets of your soul.  You will see that the more enriched it is, the deeper the silence will cover it.

 Encounter with Me takes place in living silence: there are no words, but there is the fullness of life.

 Psalm 42:2 |  Longing for God

 As the deer longs for water from the streams, so my soul longs for You, O God!

300

Tue, 25 XI 86, 10:30pm

- Fear and admiration for You, Jesus.  Then an unbearable longing.

 And now complete desolation.

 With fear I thought about the approaching time of prayer.  I can't tell you anything.  I have nothing to say.

 What is happening with me?

+I show you what you are like without My help.  I continue to allow you to get to know yourself.

 - What I see, is terrible.

+The truth about yourself hurts so much.  Take good care that it burns out in you all tendencies to pride.  And all demands of My graces or spiritual consolations.

 You don't deserve anything.  When you are completely convinced of this and do not even have the courage to ask, then all graces will be made available to you.  Then your soul will be able to receive them in humility and gratitude.

 - One more thought is with me: should I continue to keep this notebook.

 My spiritual father recommended it to me a year ago - is this order still valid for me? It is, after all, a form of asking to talk to you and is a way of taking care of yourself.

+Yes.

 You begin to feel that there is a further stage of prayer, which is abiding in Me without words.  And where sensations are completely indistinct, and attempts at expression would be sacrilege.

 You are not at this stage yet and you can continue to write.

 Such a state comes after complete self-emptying and purification of all self-esteem and all desires except admiration and gratitude to God.

 The transformation leading to this takes time and suffering.

 - You said you would always talk to me if I asked.

+Then you won't need to ask.  You will be united enough with Me to directly absorb My Wisdom and My Love. There will be no questions and no answers because there will be no separation.

 - Is it possible for a human?

+For man no, but for Me yes.  There is no limit to the greatness of My graces.

 Desire and give yourself to Me - and I will do it.

 - What will I do during prayer then?

+You will abide in Me in complete loss - self-forgetfulness - beyond time and external reality.  You will be hidden in Me and inaccessible even to yourself.

299

Tue, 25 XI 86, 12:15am 

- For some time now Your holiness and my sinfulness fill me with fear.  As if I were looking from the level of your feet at your greatness reaching the sun in the sky.

 I am in the dust of the earth, and You are the Sun covering all the sky and all the universe.  And it amazes me how such confidential conversations are possible and all that is between you and me.

+But you are My creation to whom I have given life and in whom My Love is present.  In which I am and I want to be, to fill them with myself, transform them and lift them to the height of the sun.  And place in Heaven next to My Heart.

You are in the dust of the earth.  But it is your starting point, the beginning of a path that ends at the height of My Heaven.  You receive the grace of getting to know Me and at the same time getting to know yourself.  When you get to know Me, through Me, you also see better who you are.  You see a real relationship.

 This feeling is called the fear of God.

 It should be associated with admiration, awe, gratitude.  Also with the joy that you can be and that you are My child, much loved, much desired in My House.

 The fruit of this feeling is love and the desire to do everything for Me out of love and gratitude.

 I make this feeling grow in your soul, that it transforms it.

 2 Tm 4:8

 Finally, a crown of righteousness has been set aside for me, which the Lord will give me on that day...

298

Mon,  24 XI 86, 11:20pm

- What is longing?

+My cry in your heart, which you cannot fully respond to because you are closed in your human life.  In its human form of existence limiting contact with Me.

 From the beginning of your life I have been calling you.

 Longing is the cry of a lonely God in the human soul.

 Everyone feels this call.  Rarely who recognizes.  Many drown it out.

 My good children try to answer.  But I'm not fully available.

 And they suffer the more the more clearly they hear My call.

-Are you lonely in my soul now too?

+Yes, because you still pay Me too little attention.

 - I do not know why it is like that.  There is a certain impotence, a certain impossibility, which prevents me from clinging to You completely.

+You need to pray a lot and very fervently.  And cleanse your life of everything that has to do with external matters.  What is needed is real asceticism limiting external needs to the bare minimum, combined with fervent prayer.  Continuously.

 Your way is for the chosen ones.  It has the peculiarity that you do not set these limits, but entrust everything to My decision and adapt to it, whatever it may be.

 This is a seemingly easier path, but it requires a great deal of trust and submission.

297

Mon, Nov 24, 86, 8:50am

+Reality is different than what people know about it based on their own efforts and presumptions.

 Only My light can reveal it.  This is especially true of the reality about oneself.

 Man wants to see himself better than he is.  And he generally sees what he wants, not what is.  This self-deception results in the greatest number of misunderstandings and misfortunes between people and between man and God.

 All misunderstandings, aversions, conflicts among people - including My chosen ones - are the fruit of self-deception.

In every conflict, both sides are at fault.  In different ways - but they are jointly responsible.

 If, when showing someone's evil, it is done with love and with My participation, then there is no conflict.  But it is necessary to show Love, not anger or self-superiority.

296

Sun, Nov, 23, 86, 5:30pm

- Thank you, Jesus, for the conversation in the church before the Holy Mass and later, when You were in me in Your Sacrifice.  You have given me a deeper knowledge of Your Sacrifice.

 What does all this mean?

+I want you to feel My closeness to you.  I want to teach you a lot, show you a lot and give you a lot.

 This will be possible when your encounter with Me becomes closer and constant - without interruption.  I want to lead you to it.

 You are married to Me - so you should get to know Me better and the events of My earthly life as well.  At least the most important ones.  I am slowly preparing you for this.  I do this slowly and gradually so that your sensitivity will bear the truth of what has happened since My capture in Gethsemane.

 - Even these very short and indistinct images are so strong...

+Learn to control your emotions, because they prevent you from knowing the peaceful and deep sorrow of the Truth.

 Getting to know the basics of the Truth about God and man takes place through Golgotha ​​- the authentic one and the one in your life.  A loving union with Me too.

 You made a good choice yesterday.  There is no union in ecstasy if there was no union in pain.

 Participation in My suffering is not only a test of your love, but above all it is a deepening, widening, transfiguration.  Only then is a love similar to My Love born.

 Then there is a resemblance and the possibility of perfect penetration, union, coexistence with Me and in Me.

Be faithful to the promises you have made to Me.  Do not be afraid, I know your sensitivity and I will not do anything that would be beyond your strength 

Luke 10,23-24 |  The favor of the disciples

 Then he turned to the disciples and said: «Happy eyes that see what you see.  For I tell you, many prophets and kings longed to see what you see but did not see it, and to hear what you hear but did not hear it.”